Blind Date, A Comeback in Modern Chinese Life

Blind Date, A Comeback in Modern Chinese Life

Traditionally, families had more say in regard to a marriage than the man and woman who were getting married. In the old days, young men and women that liked one another were not allowed to meet freely together. Young people who put their wishes for a mate above the wishes of their parents were considered immoral. The goal of matchmakers ever since has usually been to pair families of equal stature for the greater social good. Marriages have traditionally been regarded as unions between families with matches being made by elders who met to discuss the character of potential mates and decide whether or not a they should get married. Marriages that are arranged to varying degrees are still common and traditional considerations still plays a part in deciding who marries whom.

7 Strange Facts About The History Of Matchmaking

When I first met my husband — a Canadian — eight years ago, we had never been in a relationship before nor were we looking for one. But serendipity brought him 13, kilometres across the Pacific Ocean to a small tropical island that he had never set foot on before, and fate landed us in the same workplace as interns. Eight years later, we are happily married and living in another country.

Every now and then, we wonder at the fortuitous arrangement that brought two people from very different backgrounds together. And I can see why the ancient Chinese believed marriage arises from a predestined relationship arranged by Heaven. According to traditional belief, the married couple have forged a kinship over countless lifetimes, and this predestined relationship brings them together in this lifetime.

China has always had matchmakers but none quite like Gong Haiyan, 1 Matchmaker, as Gong is known, is following an ancient tradition.

Chinese marriages are interesting affairs fused with unique customs and traditions. As is the case with most societies, in primitive times the concept of marriage did not exist. People of a single tribe did not have fixed spouses and they could have multiple sexual partners. Marriage in ancient Chinese culture went through a lot of changes. Initially, people bearing the same surnames were allowed to get married, marriage between siblings was allowed too.

These legendary characters are responsible for the creation of mankind in Chinese mythology, they were both related by blood and they formulated proper procedures for marriage after marrying each other.

Yangfan Zou — Exploring Chinese pragmatism—Matchmaking Corner

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​The Resemblance of Background and Importance of Matchmaker. ​. In old times, marriage was arranged by parents and matchmakers. ​. In ancient Chinese.

The formation of Matchmaking Corner in China emerged in a complex context that combines Chinese pragmatism, Chinese traditional ethic, and the loneliness of the old. After briefly outlining how the process works, I will highlight the arrangement of the xiangqin the resultant meeting of prospective spouses. I then examine the criterion for marriage in the context of traditional views on marriage and an examination of the idea of marriage perceived as a social contract between two families, not as matters for the individual.

In China, Matchmaking Corner is full of elderly parents and organized by elderly parents themselves. It always takes place in the part with the most pedestrian volume in parks, which provides them a free platform to seeking a suitable spouse for their children. The Matchmaking Corner has been appearing in some main cities such as Shanghai, Beijing, Shenzhen, Nanjing and so on since The Matchmaking Corner is full of the papers hung to attract attention.

The parents walk about the Corner, looking the papers or standing by their paper, and chatting, always seeking the suitable spouse for their children. Take the matchmaking corner in Nanjing for example, the information provided on the papers here normally includes gender, age, height, appearance, personality, hobbies, education background, job, income, ownership of property, census register, even the job of their parents before.

Some information can be general, like appearance or personality. More details will be communicated simply by chatting. If the parents find the potential couple suitable, they will arrange the first dating for their children. While the requirements of future spouse are a little different between male and female, they are both required about the education background, census register, personality and height.


Some of the etiquettes have been simplified or adjusted throughout history, however, some main procedures have been inherited quite well. Nowadays, young people usually choose their partners on their own, which made this step gradually disappeared. However, for couples that are introduced by other people, they still would express their gratitude for their matchmakers.

Weddings in ancient China were a grand affair, and ancient Chinese marriage Normally a matchmaker would accompany the groom’s parents in this process.

Have you seen the movie Mulan? Disney released the move in , and it told the story of a young Chinese woman who pretends to be a man so that she could join the army. There are different versions of the story, but they agree on a woman whose father was too old and sick to join the army. To save his life, she pretended to be a man to join in his place. The stories are about a woman named Hua Mulan, who may have been a real figure who lived between and CE, during the Northern and Southern dynasties of China.

Keep reading to learn more about how the Disney version adds up to the ancient Chinese account of this extraordinary figure. When we first meet Mulan in the Disney movie, she is training with a matchmaker who knows how to prepare girls to be the docile, sweet brides that men in the image-obsessed culture desire. The problem is that Mulan is failing at every turn. She is depicted as a klutzy tomboy who is unable to perform the necessary tasks, like perfectly pouring a cup of tea.

She brings chaos into a meeting with the village matchmaker and is cast out as a disgrace. She is seen as having disgraced herself and her entire family, and she will never make a perfect bride. Mulan as a failed bride.

Ancient But Timeless Tales on Marriage

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In modern times, traditional marriage matchmakers have been replaced by online dating, speed-dating events, and even matchmaking markets. In ancient China, parents would find a suitable partner for their daughter or son. In this way, one family would look for another family of similar status so that they could get their kids married. Confucius, a philosopher in Chinese history, had a lot to say about traditional marriages. Confucian thinking in ancient China suggested that the roles of husbands and wives should be complementary—think yin and yang.

Ancient Chinese had milder ways to encourage people to find a in China that were still behind in civilization had official matchmakers as well.

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